Starkle, Starkle, Little Twink, 
I think you’ve had enough to drink.
Out in space you seem to be, lilting on a rugged sea.
Were you really trying to wink?
You must think you’re really wise,
Behind those blood-shot, swollen eyes.

Starkle, Starkle, Little Twink, 
As we speak, your breath does stink.
You say you think we ought to dance. 
 I say I think there is no chance.
You look just like the missing link.
Slobber running down your chin; 
Thank God you’re not my next of kin.

Starkle, Starkle, Little Twink, 
You’re asking me just what I think?
I think you should go and stay in a rehab – today.
You say you think Joe needs a shrink.
I think you need to settle down, 
Before you get knocked to the ground.

Starkle, Starkle, Little Twink, 
I think that you have reached the brink.
It’s your last that you just chugged
For out of nowhere you were slugged.
To the floor, I watch you sink.
Ungracefully, you went kerplop
Just before I saw the cop.

Starkle, Starkle, Little Twink, 
I think you’re heading to the clink.
As you try to push and shove the officers that stand above.
You said you thought I was a fink.
It wasn’t me who called the fuz. 
 They must have known just who you was.